


I thought you were dead

by cyoza



Category: The Expanse (TV)
Genre: Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Is it fluff?, idk - Freeform, idk what else to tag honestly, not really - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-16
Updated: 2020-01-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:01:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22283782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cyoza/pseuds/cyoza
Summary: Just an EXPANSION (haha) on the little chat that Namoi and Jim had in after he finds Lucia and Naomi on Ilus.
Relationships: Jim Holden & Naomi Nagata, Jim Holden/Naomi Nagata
Comments: 4
Kudos: 30





	I thought you were dead

The faint beep of the stats monitor pulled Naomi from unconsciousness and she cursed it immediately. Her whole body felt as though it had been in high G for hours and hours; her veins filled with ice water and burning lava at the same time. 

She mustered the miniscule strength she could find and pried open her eyelids, instantly rewarded with Jim’s soft mahogany gaze. She lolled her head to the side to face him fully as she lifted the corners of her mouth to give him a small smile. She hoped it would comfort him but the action only seemed to deepen the concern in his eyes. 

‘How’re you feeling?’ He asked redundantly, knowing well enough that she was probably in the worst shape she’d ever been in. 

‘I’ve been better.’ Her voice croaked with exhaustion, uncharacteristically weak. 

He said nothing then, not really knowing where to begin so he just pressed his lips together and continued staring at her but not really seeing her, lost in his own thoughts.

Why didn’t she trust him enough to tell him? 

How could he have been dense enough not to notice?

‘How’s Lucia?’ Her voice pulled his attention back to her but he paused before speaking, clearing his throat so it didn’t sound as tight as it felt. 

‘She’s okay. She’s resting in her cabin,’ He told her absently.

‘Jim.’ She started with a sigh, her voice gentle but firm as she slid her arm further down the autodoc to slip her hand into his.

‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ He interrupted, sensing exactly where she was heading with the conversation. ‘What happened to dealing with everything together?’ His tone was slightly accusatory but he couldn’t help it. 

‘I didn’t want to worry you. There was already so much happening and I didn’t want to add anymore problems. I thought I could handle it,’ She admitted. 

‘You could have died, Naomi. And for a split second, I thought you had. When we got you back on the Roci, before I got the autodoc on you. The way your eyes rolled to the back of your head, I thought you were dead. I thought we were too late.’ He swallowed hard as he recalled the moment, the remnants of fear rising up as he spoke. 

‘I just wanted to be part of this. All those Belters down here, they deserve all the help they could get. Murtry had no right doing what he did and we needed to stop him. They needed our help and I couldn’t just sit back and hang about in orbit.’ Her voice was stronger, filled with the passion that always shone through whenever she spoke about her people.

Jim could do nothing but let out a sigh, understanding why she did what she did but feeling no less frustrated about it. He lifted his free hand to cup her face and she leaned into it, both of them grateful for the contact. She looked paler than he’d ever seen her, the dark circles under her eyes contrasting starkly against her sickly complexion. Other times when their lives had been at risk, they had time to accept what was happening, to say goodbye. But this time, he could have lost her without even a final word and over something so stupid. He ghosted his thumb over the peak of her cheek as he let out a subconscious sigh, as if his body was trying to breath out the negative energy inside of him. He continued to scan her face as he thought of what could have happened if Alex and he didnt in fact get there in time, his heart clenching painfully at the prospect. 

‘We already have so much stacked against us, Naomi. With everything we’ve been through, I can’t lose you over something so ridiculously preventable.’ He admonished softly. 

‘I know. I should have told you, I’m sorry.’ She apologised, gripping his hand just a bit tighter to punctuate her apology. 

‘I love you.’ He gave her a tender smile, leaning forward for a quick press of his lips on hers and hovered over her, glad to be close to her. 

She didn’t say anything at first, lifting two fingers to swipe across her lips before she placed them gently on his. He’d seen the gesture a thousand times before but it never failed to send a tingling warmth prickling all over his body. 

‘I love you, too.’ She whispered. 

But she didn’t need to, he already knew.

**Author's Note:**

> hello, hello! 
> 
> I got a request from a prompt list i reblogged a few weeks ago and its taken me a while I’m sorry and it’s a little short but I felt kinda intimidated by trying to get their characters right and i recognise they kinda already did this on the show and i get why they didn’t discuss it further on the show but it doesn’t mean i have to like it. so i kinda could only think of this instance for this prompt 
> 
> anyway i’ll stop rambling, this is my first nolden fic so pls be gentle but i hope was a good read!


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